


Darcy Lewis and the Crazy Ass Week

by Devidlg



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Badass Darcy is badass, Crossover, Darcy Lewis Daughter of Aphrodite, Darcy is a Demigod, Demigod Darcy, F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-17
Updated: 2016-02-17
Packaged: 2018-05-17 16:42:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5878069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Devidlg/pseuds/Devidlg
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Darcy Lewis was having a crazy couple of days.</p><p>First, one of Jane's doohickeys had malfunctioned and tried to eat her favorite shirt, then she ran someone over.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Darcy Lewis and the Crazy Ass Week

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was spawned from a conversation with my fantastic beta[ Joy](http://thejoysofamultishipper.tumblr.com/). Her work is amazing and she's a goddess of grammar. Her beta skillz are the only reason this is being posted.
> 
> Come talk to me on [tumblr](http://devidlg.tumblr.com) maybe?
> 
> I don't own The Avengers, Marvel, or Percy Jackson. If I did this would be cannon. And it's not.

Darcy Lewis was having a crazy couple of days.

First, one of Jane's doohickeys had malfunctioned and tried to eat her favorite shirt, then she ran someone over.

When the guy started calling himself Thor and asking about his hammer, Darcy figured it was best to test his claim by tasing him. The man fell with a thud and since Darcy was pretty sure she hadn't just taken out the Norse god of thunder, they pulled him into the van and drove him to the hospital.

Then muscle man came back and convinced Jane to help him sneak into a _top secret government facility_. And then Darcy had to call in an old favor to hack the DMV and get "Thor" out of trouble.

 _Then_ _honest to gods_ _Asgardians_ show up and claim Thor is their Prince. Darcy was really regretting tasing him at that point.

And now there was a giant robot attacking Thor and company. A nice way to round everything out. 

In hindsight, Darcy shouldn't have been so skeptical. Chiron had taught her the world was filled with some crazy ass shit. This shouldn't have surprised her. And if the Greek gods existed, why not the Norse ones. Hell, why not get Ra up in here. He’d liven things up.

Jane screamed from Darcy's left and Darcy grabbed the scientist and pulled her out of the way of some falling rubble.

“ _Gods_ , Jane. You picked a trouble maker. Couldn’t you have gone all starry eyed over a mailman or something?”

“That isn’t helping Darcy!” Jane shouted as the destroyer threw Lady Sif into the diner across the street.

“I snark when I’m stressed Jane. I get it from my father. Granted, I snark when I’m _not_ stressed. Which I also get from my father, but that is beside the point.” Darcy rambles as she guides Jane across the street away from the insane killing machine intent on destroying all of New Mexico. Darcy’s training kicked in and she pulled her back as Volstagg crashed through the building in front of them.

The Destroyer started toward them, Fandral and Hogun tried to draw its attention, but it seemed intent on Darcy and Jane.

Swearing under her breath, Darcy pushed Jane through the hole Volstagg had carved through the post office, and pulled her scarf from her neck. Running her hand along the scarf she felt it transform under her fingers; the smooth leather of the whip familiar as she grasped the handle and cracked it once, the Celestial Bronze tip whistling through the air.

Darcy wasn’t sure what the bronze would do to the Destroyer, but she sure as hell wasn’t about to sit still and let it kill her and Jane. Luckily Fandral and Hogan had dug Sif out of the diner and were hurrying down the street. And she heard Thor behind her with Jane trying to wake Volstagg. She just had to keep the Destroyer busy until they got close enough.

She cracked the whip out and struck the Destroyer’s leg. The bronze cut a gouge through its leg but that did nothing to stall its progress.

“Darcy, what the hell?!” She heard Jane shout from behind her.

“Not now, Janie. I’m busy.” With all her strength Darcy cracked the whip again and this time aimed for the machine’s face.

The Destroyer kept moving toward Darcy, but stumbled, which gave Sif enough time to jump onto its back and its focus shifted off of Darcy. Darcy turned around grabbed Jane’s hand and hauled ass to the end of the road.

“Darcy, wha-“ Jane’s question was cut off by Thor’s noble sacrifice and then the awesome lightning show that brought back his powers. Then Thor swept Jane up and took off, which left Darcy to drive, Erik and Lady Sif and the Warriors Three to the Bifrost sight in the van. She tossed her whip onto the dash and started the car while everyone piled in.

Sif ended up in the passenger seat next to Darcy and saw the whip.

“May I?” Sif asks gesturing to the whip. Darcy nods and the woman picks up the whip examining it closely. “This is a fine weapon, Darcy Lewis. You possess great skill.”

“Thanks, that means a lot coming from you.”

Sif nods.

“I do not recognize this metal.” She says examining the bronze tip.

“It’s Celestial Bronze. Great on monsters, but doesn’t harm mortals. It was a gift from my mother for completing my quest. She could’ve given it to me _before_ my quest. But _nooo_ she waited till after.” Darcy said rolling her eyes.

“Who the hell is your mother?” Erik asks from where he is jammed between Fandral, Volstagg, and Hogun.

“Aphrodite. Grecian goddess of love and beauty.”

“That’s insane.” Erik splutters.

“Dude, you had a drinking contest with _Thor_ yesterday. And you currently have the elbows of not one, but _two_ Æsir digging into your ribcage. The world is insane, my friend.”

Erik didn’t respond to that.

“I didn’t know the Norse gods were real though. So this whole experience has really thrown me for a loop. Chiron never mentioned the other gods, but I guess I never asked.”

“You were trained by the centaur Chiron?” Erik asks.

“Well, he was more camp counselor than anything. But he was in charge of all the important questions Mr. D didn’t want to answer.”

“I remember Chiron. He trained good warriors.” Fandral added from the back seat. “Perseus was one of his, yes?”

That’s how the rest of the drive went. One of the Æsir would ask a polite question about someone they remembered from the old days, Darcy would politely answer and Erik just shrugged and went along with it.

When they finally pulled up to the Bifrost site they all got out of the car just in time to see Jane and Thor’s romantic goodbye. Fandral even kissed Darcy’s hand as he left. That combined with the fact that no one had died, made this day a success.

After Jane had snapped out of her Thor-kiss-induced haze, she turned to Darcy.

“What the actual hell Darcy.”

Darcy ran her hand over her whip and felt it change back to wool under her fingers, then wrapped it around her neck again.

“It’s a _long_ story Jane.”

**Author's Note:**

> While it's not explicitly stated in the fic, I originally wrote this as Darcy being Tony's daughter. It didn't flow right so I left it out, but that's who Darcy is talking about when she refers to her father.


End file.
